Freedom
by Morbid Muse
Summary: Freedom is just another way of saying nothing left to lose. (Faith/Oz shipper)


Author: AmandaB9@aol.com  
  
Title: Freedom  
  
Shipper: Faith/Oz  
  
Rated: R  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own 'em. yet!  
  
Summary: Freedom is just another way of saying nothing left to lose.  
  
Spoilers: New Moon Rising and Sanctuary  
  
Chapters: 1/1  
  
Note: '' indicates Faith's thoughts  
  
  
  
Faith still thought about him sometimes. Even though their encounter had been so long ago, Faith still found herself remembering their time together every now and then.  
  
Back when Faith had been so free and she had met up with someone from her past who was lucky enough to share the same burden.  
  
----  
  
The most remarkable thing about that day was that it was so ordinary. The whether was just as it had been all week. Normal Brazilian temperature for that time of year and the café was as blissfully empty as Faith had come accustom to being able to count on.  
  
"You?"  
  
Faith jolted up more from the shock of hearing English again after getting so used to Portuguese than from anything else. She should have recognized the voice, or at least the venom in it, but instead she just noticed her native language.  
  
"Last I saw, you were in a coma."  
  
'Oz. Oh my God, it is Oz. It is one of them. I'm through.'  
  
The thoughts kept repeating over in her mind. Especially the last part.  
  
'I'm caught! I'm caught!'  
  
"Oz."  
  
Amazing how her voice could sound so stead while her brain kept racing.  
  
Faith didn't know how long they stood like that, just each staring at the other.  
  
"May as well pull up a chair, Oz."  
  
And to her utter surprise, he actually did. Eyes never leaving Faith, Oz sat down across from her. Faith knew he didn't trust her - he really had no right to. So what was he doing sitting at her table alone when they both knew he would be no match against a slayer?  
  
It was then that Faith really took in the fact that he was alone. No one to tell him to not sit and chat with a person he knew to be a killer. No one to wait around for him and worry if he was late. Oz was, just like Faith, completely free.  
  
"Look I know what you're thinking."  
  
One eyebrow rose.  
  
Well, obviously Oz hadn't become more talkative since Faith had last seen him.  
  
"Okay, so maybe I don't exactly know what you're thinking but I bet I have an idea. And I am better now. Really! That whole 'Mayor, kill everyone, destroy the world' deal was just a phase. I'm way past it now."  
  
Silence.  
  
"Yeah, maybe it took some help from Angel and a few years in jail, but I really did learn my lesson. Honest."  
  
"Jail, huh?"  
  
"I turned myself in, didn't you hear?"  
  
"No."  
  
"Well, I did. I did some bad things and I had to take the fall out of it or I could never hope to gain redemption."  
  
That damn eyebrow again.  
  
"Angel's teachings. But ya know what? He was right. I served my time. I just didn't want to stick around after. Figured I would just come out here where no one would know me and live all good slayer like. I mean, come on, you Sunnydalers don't honestly believe that California is the only place with supernatural problems, do you?"  
  
"Ex-Sunnydaler."  
  
"Yeah, so I see. What happened? Hey, you didn't commit some crime too, did you?"  
  
And for the first time that night he smiled. Well not really smiled, it was more like a sarcastic lift of the corners of his lips, but it was still something.  
  
"Well."  
  
The next morning Faith had awaken to the feel of a thin arm over her bare body. Then it had all came floating back to her. From the surprisingly long conversation considering it was Oz, to the walk back to her hotel room, to the sex.  
  
Oh, God the incredible sex.  
  
Oz was a werewolf and Faith a slayer. The sex had been rough and animalistic at best but she wouldn't have had it any other way.  
  
But as the night progressed things changed. What had started out almost savage became almost gentle. For the first time Faith could remember, she enjoyed that as much, if not even a little more, than her usual style.  
  
What was she thinking? She couldn't over analyze this too much. It was Oz. He was one of them. A Sunnydaler from her old life. He had seen her at her worst and she knew just how bad that could be.  
  
Faith had to leave, had to get out. It was bad to be having fleeting thoughts of sticking around for anyone, but him? Someone from her past? No, no way. It didn't matter how much fun she'd had last night or how much she had to keep reminding herself was doing the right thing as she got dressed. None of it mattered except that she had to leave before she could convince herself otherwise.  
  
Among other problems, if she stuck around, she'd lose her hard-earned freedom. She learned during her long stay in prison, where freedom was only a distant dream, not to let herself underestimate her freedom every again. Now that she finally had it Faith wasn't about to give it away for no good reason. Staying with Oz would mean gaining ties. It meant having something to lose. It meant no more freedom.  
  
Faith allowed herself one last long look at Oz's still sleeping body before leaving.  
  
---  
  
Faith wondered sometimes about Oz. Wondered how he reacted to waking up alone in a hotel room that wasn't his. Wondered if he noticed she had cleared out all her stuff or if he just took off. Wondered what he was doing with his life now and if he ever thought of her like she did of him. Wondered what would have happened if she had stuck around.  
  
Would her life be so different? Would she have still just taken off like she had with everyone else she'd been with? Would they have made it as a couple? What Faith figured was the most realistic question was how long until Oz left her?  
  
There was no way of knowing now and Faith honestly didn't know weather or not she was happy about that. She was still completely alone, but consulted herself with the knowledge that she when she went out to fight, she wouldn't worry about anyone worrying about her. Faith knew no one waited around for her just as no one would know to weep if she ever died in battle.  
  
Faith always knew the trade off of freedom; having nothing left to lose.  
  
  
  
=(Amanda(= 


End file.
